We have an election coming up - did you notice?
At the turn of the 20th century women in the UK could not vote.
It's now 2015 and we have clearly come a long way with regards to the position of women, and yet still we are having to flag up the fact that women are not taking senior positions in society. If you want to see some facts and figures Women in parliaments is a good article.
This month 3 women took their rightful place at the Leaders Debate on TV and many of us celebrated (regardless of our own political leaning).
On twitter this is what happened
Obviously we know that David Vance is a right wing nut job, but the Independent...
Seriously!!
It was Easter weekend and I decided to go back to bed with my coffee and catch up with my Facebook friends when up popped this...
Of course in Zig's day he was talking to men and we could maybe excuse his crassness. But this was shared on April 6th 2015 by a professional organisation that doesn't seem to understand their audience.
As I decided that my day couldn't get any worse I posted Vance's tweet on my Facebook wall thinking most of my Facebook friends think like me. So I was pretty taken aback when a fair few of the responses showed a need to play down sexism and call it something else! Why?
Why are we not allowed to call sexism SEXISM?
Even my phone wont type sexism!
Who are we offending when we do that? Can we only call it sexism if men say we can? Have we worked so hard to assimilate that we don't even notice it any more? Or are we just too aware of the backlash that comes from those that feel threatened?
As I tenaciously argued the right to name Vance's post as sexist, assumptions were made about me....that I am a lesbian, or that I have had a bitter divorce. Really! in 2015 the message is still that women who fight for equality have a dysfunctional relationship with men?
I am completely clear that boys and girls are all being confused by sexism.
On a train journey this week the parent of 2 little girls sat opposite me told them "I recorded Beauty and the Beast for you".
The youngest, aged about 3, asked if Jack could watch it with them. The parent replied that he wouldn't want to. The girl of course asked why (which was clearly her word of the week) and she was told "..because he's a boy and it's a girls film".
I watched, mortified, as this very bright and articulate little girl took that information in. For the first time all train journey she didn't ask why, but her face showed absolute confusion as her brain tried to compute this.
When I shared this with my daughter she said "you just witnessed sexism going into a new generation".
Where I am stuck is; what is our investment in maintaining sexism?
As a mum of an awesome teenage girl, I know that I have to name oppression and prejudice. I know that if I stand back and allow her to internalise and accept sexism, her wings will be well and truly clipped.
I am completely clear that boys and girls are all being confused by sexism.
On a train journey this week the parent of 2 little girls sat opposite me told them "I recorded Beauty and the Beast for you".
The youngest, aged about 3, asked if Jack could watch it with them. The parent replied that he wouldn't want to. The girl of course asked why (which was clearly her word of the week) and she was told "..because he's a boy and it's a girls film".
I watched, mortified, as this very bright and articulate little girl took that information in. For the first time all train journey she didn't ask why, but her face showed absolute confusion as her brain tried to compute this.
When I shared this with my daughter she said "you just witnessed sexism going into a new generation".
Where I am stuck is; what is our investment in maintaining sexism?
I understand Vance's investment in it, he clearly feels very threatened by the emergence of intelligent, articulate, strong women. But the rest of us, what do we gain from maintaining it?
As a mum of an awesome teenage girl, I know that I have to name oppression and prejudice. I know that if I stand back and allow her to internalise and accept sexism, her wings will be well and truly clipped.
I'm a child of the 60s and I did Sociology at the Uni of Essex in the 80s, so I realise I may see things a little differently to the general population. I'm also dyspraxic which means that I do tend to do the logical v illogical when it comes down to prejudice. (I've been on the receiving end of a fair amount myself of course, both personally and professionally in a very male world - and I do know that it hurts and does damage).
But, if we want to raise kick ass girls, and boys, we have to tell them the truth; that there is a whole crazy mess out there concerning gender, but also explain that it's just cultural and can and is being changed.
And we have to tell them that we are fighting for their rights to be treated well as human beings, not based on gender, colour, sexuality or anything else that has nothing whatsoever to do with the career path they take.
But, if we want to raise kick ass girls, and boys, we have to tell them the truth; that there is a whole crazy mess out there concerning gender, but also explain that it's just cultural and can and is being changed.
And we have to tell them that we are fighting for their rights to be treated well as human beings, not based on gender, colour, sexuality or anything else that has nothing whatsoever to do with the career path they take.
If you no longer notice sexism pop over to twitter and put #everydaysexism in the seach bar. It's enlightening.
I would LOVE to read your good thinking on this, so please do leave a comment.
Jane xx
